September 28, 2005
workin' for the man yet?
I'm writing letters to publishers asking for freelance work as an editor or copy editor. It's quite distressing to write to someone asking to do editing when you know that your grammer end spelling ain't always good.
I found a place that is in serious need of my help, although I do think that they might be beyond help. Here's their description:
The [names have been changed to protect the innocent] has now advanced into the Mail Art syntagma within the context of Indefinite Surrealism in the fashion of Indefinite Design for exhibition, reading, website display, artistamps, and criticism by theoretical writing. While an effort is being made to generate Web Poetics as it correlates to the Mail Art dimension with free reader access or downloading, there remains the ambition to produce artifacts such as well-designed books that are esteemed for their material values in addition to the intellectual value of the writing. In commercial terms, the Surrealist Design, like House Mail, offers something of substantial, uncompromising value as a Free Expression, but in adddition reserves a supplemental quantity or quality to be purchased or industrialized under a license.
I wonder if the person writing this is giggling madly and cackling while saying, "If they send it here, I know I don't want it! What pretentious stink-heads!" I wonder if they giggle like that. When I stop wondering, though, I'm pretty sure they're serious.
And here's another description:
We are a small press, and publish chapbooks and chapbook-sized works. [This company] concentrates on helping those who are suicidal and depressed by publishing works of catharsis. All works we publish are dark, painful, anguished. Currently emphasizing scholarly nonfiction, essays and literary criticism. Scholarly works of the dark, painful, and anguished variety...is there any other kind? [and then add this] Write to us for our guidelines; they spell out exactly what we will and won't accept. I would encourage writers to be more professional than ever in regards to preparing their submissions. I will destroy any mail that comes to us without a return address specifying a particular person as well as any letter or package that is very haphazardly put together.
So they're worried about bombs and disorganized people. At least their priorities are in the right order. Bombs are, indeed, somewhat more dangerous than disorganization.
How long will it be until I become one of these people? Will I have to write dark, painful, and anguished notes in the margins?
Only time will tell.